I know something about parenting. My wife and I have six children. Currently, they are all over 30 years old except our youngest son who is 23. As I reflect on my children and then on my childhood, I am convinced that Christian parenting is increasingly more difficult these days.
Most of my 43 years of preaching, I have served as a church pastor. I believe most if not all pastors will agree that pastoring is one of the most challenging “jobs” you can have. It’s not just physically trying but also spiritual. But the same thing can be said about parenting. At times, I have jokingly asked myself, which is the more challenging. Pastoring or parenting?
For Christians, the Word of God is our guide for effective Christian parenting. A popular parenting verse is found in Proverbs 22:6. It reads, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (KJV).
But let’s think about that. Have you ever known of a child who was brought up in a Christian home, and who strayed from the faith when he became an adult? I certainly have. In fact, one of the challenges in the church today is that many youths stop attending church after they become young adults.
How do we reconcile this problem among young adults with the claim of the verse above? According to it, when your child is old, he will not depart from the way he was taught to go in.
The problem is that we tend to look at the one verse above in a vacuum. Effective Christian parenting requires a more comprehensive view of the verse. Here are four vital components of training up a child effectively:
1. Start Early.
The phrase “train up” comes from a Hebrew word meaning to “initiate or discipline.” Parents should not wait until they see their child going in an unacceptable way before taking the role of parenting seriously. Rather, they must be the initiators of showing their children the way they should go—early in life. That is when they are most responsive to discipline.
2. Model the Way.
“Do as I say and not as you see me do” does not work. Perhaps that will work the first few years of your children’s life. But as they become older, it becomes important for you to model the way you are disciplining your children to live. “Living what you preach” adds moral authority to your parenting efforts. Failure to do so compromises that authority. Children have a way of reminding parents of their hypocrisy. Remember, action speaks much more loudly than words do.
3. Trust God to Give the Increase.
As Christian parents, we are laborers together with God. We plant and water, but God gives the increase (see 1 Corinthians 3:6). Things we want to see happening in our child’s life may not happen in the window of time we want them to. We must not become discouraged but we must continue to plant and water the appropriate “seeds.” God will be faithful to bring the increase in due season.
4. Faithfully Pray for Your Children.
They devil does not want you to succeed in raising a champion for the Kingdom. He will try anything and everything to oppose your efforts. That’s why parents must keep their children’s name before the Lord in prayer. We know He will hear us because we are praying according to His will. It is His will to save our children and for them to live for Him.
Christian Parenting Today
Today, it is more challenging than ever before to raise children with a biblical worldview. But it’s not hopeless for Christian parents. The good news is that God’s Word is the truth for all generations. The first of the four points above is explicit in Proverbs 22:6. The other three are implicitly there. In other words, training our children must include our being an example, trusting God, and praying for our children.
Copyright © 2024 by Frank King. All rights reserved.